Thursday, April 14, 2011

whether the weather will whatever

The wind breathes warmth into my room, foreshadowing temperamental thunderstorms that have yet to come. The door to my balcony is wide open as I wait for the weather to make a decision.

The weather has decided to adopt the ‘Japanese horror-film’ version of suspense – the slow build up with no ultimate climax. The atmosphere – constantly heavy. You feel your breathing becoming labored, because of a constant pressure on your chest. It's psychological, don't worry. If you’re not paying close attention, time drags you to no ultimate destination.

I take my time walking into my room and then out again onto the balcony, adjusting to the noticeable difference in temperature.

Should I wear a sweater? It’s cold in my room even though I’ve left the door open all day. But…I can’t bring myself to do it, despite my discomfort. I think it’s as ridiculous as wearing a sweater in the summer because the AC is turned on high – while people outside are dying of heat.

The sky has been brushed grey and the air weighs down on me -- a sigh barely escapes my lips. I want to stand on my balcony and watch as people walk by, but my neighbor is out on his balcony… and hypocritically enough, I hate when people watch me people watch. Watching people people-watch.

I should go for a run. Or stop typing. Focus on work? Translate a few poems for fun. Read the Murakami book I’ve had bookmarked halfway but haven’t touched in two months. Study Chinese. Finish my stupid essays. Start my Chinese essay. Review my Modern Chinese chapter.

I don’t have a point to this post. I’ll save you the headache of reading my thoughts and stop here.

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